Psychology for Thriving

Counselling & Psychological Services

My goal working with you is to help you live a rich, full and meaningful life. The science of human behaviour helps us notice that developing psychological flexibility is important in achieving this goal.


The focus in counselling is to improve our skills to be present as a fully conscious human being in whatever situation or experience we find ourselves. We learn to do this by noticing (like a scientist) what we experience in our bodies and our minds in each experience and developing the capacity to accept the emotions, feelings, urges, sensations and thoughts that are showing up, rather than trying to avoid or control them. This takes self-compassion, courage and gentle but regular practice.

I invite you to do some behavioural experiments using the diagram below using the following instructions:

  • Look at each of the circles and see which questions you identify with.

  • Hover over the circle to discover the suggested skill to practice.

  • You might find it useful to keep a journal of this experience to discuss at a further appointment.

Be willing to let go, open up and accept what is happening

Trying to avoiding or push away uncomfortable emotions, feelings, urges, sensations and thoughts?

Pause, breath & be willing to experience this moment

Dwelling on the past? Worrying about the future?

Commit to doing one thing towards what you want

Not going where you want to be? Giving up easily? Feeling stuck?

While you try these experiments try to stay in contact with:

  • What is important to you.

  • How you would prefer to be in this situation

  • Whom you want to be when particular emotions, feelings, urges, sensations and thoughts show up

  • Which direction your behaviour is taking you - towards the things that are important or away from them

As you practice these skills (the skills of psychological flexibility) you may notice that you begin to take actions that are more consistent with the things that are important to you and less influenced by particular thoughts, feelings, emotions, urges, sensations and thoughts that you experiencing at any time. Over time practising these skills will help achieve the goal of a rich, full and meaningful life you desire.

Pause and watch your thoughts. Imagine them as words on a screen. Say them out loud.

Caught up in and fused with your thoughts? 

Psychological Flexibility

Stop and notice it's you feeling and thinking. Also, notice your ability and skill to do something different 

Only seeing yourself as just your current struggle? Is there more to you?

Take a moment to connect with what's important to you right now

Trying to follow all the rules?Feeling disconnected to what matters to you?

Proud & Thriving

Supporting individuals, couples, groups and organisations thrive